Stop Telling Me to Have a “Last-Chance Baby”

“Can I see your ID?” the cashier asked as two bottles of Merlot made their way down the conveyor belt. “Of course!” I exclaimed with entirely too much enthusiasm. “Oh, you’re almost 40,” she remarked. As I nodded and braced myself for a pity compliment on good aging, she pointed to my kids. “How old […]

I’ll Never Truly Be “Done” Having Babies

As a woman, I’ve spent as much of my fertile life trying to prevent pregnancy as I have trying to facilitate it. At 26, I gave birth to my first child. At 30, I suffered a miscarriage. At 31, I gave birth to my second child. At 35, I questioned another. At 36, I decided […]

I’m Afraid to Start Having Babies (Again)

Three days ago I decided I was ready for another baby. Then yesterday I changed my mind. Today I feel indifferent. And that’s only the last three days, folks. This yes-no-maybe so baby pendulum has been swinging back and forth for a couple of years now. Unless you’ve been living under a pile of laundry […]

Is Running Out of Time Any Reason to Have a Baby?

So a lot has happened to make me feel, *ahem* older lately. I had a birthday. My son turned 12. I celebrated my 20-year high school reunion. And while any one of these things is enough to make you wonder whether you’ve done Oprah proud, one big question continues to nag at my consciousness: should […]

Michelle Duggar, My Ovaries Salute You

My entire reproductive system is giving you a big high five here.

Let’s Get it Started!


A Tongue and Cheek Approach to Pregnancy

I found pregnancy to be pretty damn scary. Between puking in the #2 lane of the I-210 during morning rush hour, growing a Selleck ‘stash and peeing on the bathroom floor – my body was doing all sorts of crazy things without my permission. I reached out to all you fabulous Mommy Friends on Facebook about your […]

And Baby Makes 5?

As a mom of two boys who also happens to be in her mid-thirties, I get asked — scratch that, told — pretty much every day that I need to have a baby of the female variety, and soon. “You know, you’re not getting any younger,” helpful types tell me, as if I’m unclear on […]

Rockin’ the Bump

Have you joined Rockin’ the Bump at Things I Can’t Say? All the cool Mommy Friends are doing it.  I’m a little late to the party, the linky closes tomorrow night, eeks…but better late than never! Here I am with behbey numero uno. Pregnancy pics from Boy Wonder are hard to come by, they are all shoved […]

Say This, Not That: Conversations with an Expectant Mother

Why, oh why are some people so stupid around pregnant women?  It’s like they forgot how to be decent or even courteous to a woman who is busy growing a tiny human.  Tell me, what was the rudest thing said to you while pregnant? I wrote a simple guide for conversing with an expectant mother, […]