Never (Ever, Ever) Apologize for the Parent You Are

Someone please tell me why (oh why) people care so much if a random 4 year old is in a stroller or if a 3 year old still sucks on a paci?

Who freaking cares?!

I know, I know, a paci is bad for speech (I think) and maybe oral development (or did I make that up?).

All I know is this: I don’t really care how you parent, but for some unknown reason, lots of people do.

So long as your child is loved and cared for, why should anyone care if your toddler eats standing or plays with toy guns?

I wrote about the fact that my toddler has a TV in his room and I’m not sorry. Wow, people cared. I guess I was flattered even if some of the comments were pretty harsh. For the record, I’m still not sorry.

Find what works for you and use it. If you live to regret the parenting decisions you’ve made and have bad habits to break, so be it. We all have ‘em.

I have made and will continue to make plenty of questionable parenting choices, but it’s me who has to live with them – no one else. Like starting the habit of cinnamon roll Sundays? My idea. My kids love it, my ass hates me. Or the habit of a toddler in my bed when he can’t sleep? My toddler loves it, my husband doesn’t. We each have the right to raise our kids with the best of intentions.

You know your child and you know what works. Good, bad or indifferent, these are our choices to make for it is we who suffer the consequences and reap the rewards. It’s all about practical, livable parenting within the confines of the values your family personally holds dear. Your parenting choices are for no one else to judge so stand true to what works for you and thank everyone else for their concern.

Somewhere along the way we lost the humor in the absurdity of our everyday: our kids freaking out, poop on the floor, boogers on our shirts – come on people, this stuff is ridiculous and all together awesome. Bottom line: We’re all just trying to survive and embrace the crazy in our own way. Who said parenting had to be so serious all the time?

We each have the right to raise happy and healthy kids our own way so parent on with your awesome self.

Never ever be sorry for the parent you are; your child wouldn’t want you any other way.

 

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Comments

  1. Okay this is amazing on two fronts, that you were offered an interview AND that you said no. Your choice says so much about your character. So glad I came to visit from Tina’s site :).

  2. While I’m firmly in the “no TV in the bedroom” camp, I would never go so far as to judge another mother as “neglectful” or “abusive” for choosing to go that route. To each their own.

    But I have mad respect for you for declining, and I have to say, I would’ve done the exact same thing. But still… very exciting!

  3. You shouldn’t be sorry.

    But dang girl- what a way to kick off your start with Babble! Awesome!

    Though… I’d probably go on GMA. 😉

  4. I knew I liked you, but now I think I LOVE you. 😉

  5. Your take on this is so refreshing. Thank you!

  6. You are amazing! A-MAZ-ING! I’m so proud that you stuck to your principals and said NO and stand by your post. THAT is being true to yourself, and THAT is an incredibly wonderful thing to show and teach your children!! BRAVO!

    • I couldn’t have said it better. I have no love for the mom-on-mom finger-pointing that goes on all over the net. You have no reason to apologize and your kids will take this lesson to heart. Good on you, mama.

  7. You are awesome, Lori. Good for you for standing your ground and not being lured by the temptation that is GMA.

  8. good for you!

  9. i am so proud of you friend!!!

  10. YOU SAID NO?

    THAT needs to be an even BIGGER post on Babble…the reason you said NO to national coverage.

    Proud of you, mama.

  11. I kind of wish you would have gone on TV! There needs to be discussion about this on a national stage. No more mommy guilt. No more judgement or hurtfut, unwarranted criticism of parenting techniques. I also, feel, however, that it’s a great platform to talk about *actual* child abuse… and when it *is* appropriate to step in. Keep up the nice work!

  12. Loved you before, love you even more now. Staying true to who you are, brilliant. xoxo

  13. That is so impressive that you didn’t go on the air – I would have enjoyed watching you but completely and totally respect your opinion. Personally, I know that some of my parenting methods are all wrong, and I wouldn’t want to air my dirty laundry either. Respect, mama!

  14. Yes, very well said! And, I agree with Brianne, as long as it doesn’t affect my child!

  15. You declined? seriously? I don’t even know you and I have such respect! You didn’t default to “I want publicity no matter the cost.” Impressive.

    And parenting means never having to say you’re sorry.
    Or something like that.

  16. Very Well Said!! I wish everyone would mind their own business. yes you are entitled to your opinions but like your momma said “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all!”

    However I’d like to point out a favorite phrase from a very good friend which is
    “Your “bad” parenting is none of my business until it affects my kids”( -S. Britt.) in which case if you are truely a bad parent and it is affecting my child then I will be all up in your business!

Trackbacks

  1. […] My Toddler Has a TV in his Room and I’m Not Sorry: The post that lead Good Morning America to want to interview me. Seriously. You can find out how I felt about it here. […]

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