99 Problems Only Teenagers Understand

You think you have problems? Try being a teenager. With big changes, bigger questions, and even bigger ideas, teenaging can only be described as tumultuous.

Here are 99 problems I’ve noticed as a mom of a teen boy:

There’s no ramen in the house.
PIMPLES.
Constantly being told to put the phone down.
Being expected to act like an adult while being treated like a kid.
Wanting to buy something online but not having a credit card.
Not looking like/dating Taylor Swift.
Your parents following you on Instagram.
Having six teachers.
Homework over the weekend.
“You’re too young for that.”
“You’re too old for that.”
Feelings. So. Many. Feelings.
When your life is more dramatic than reality TV.
Friends who stab you in the back.
Getting your phone taken away.
Grandma thinking your Facebook wall is private.
People who kiss and tell.
When you’re the only single one.
Not having a lock on your bedroom door.
Parents having no chill.
Being unfriended.
Mean girls.
When your best friend ditches you for a boy/girlfriend.
Being so tired.
Not being able to afford anything on your allowance.
Knowing more than your parents think you know.
Backne.
When the person you like hasn’t texted you back but is active online.
School starting way too early.
Having a paper due tomorrow that you haven’t started. Oh, and it’s 11 PM.
Parents who think you’re complaining when you’re only stating your opinion.
Mom forcing you to get a haircut.
Parents who ask too many questions about your friends.
Parents who insist on meeting your friends.
Parents who insist on meeting your friends’ parents.
Parents who insist on meeting your teachers.
Parents who won’t spring for unlimited data.
Random adults that give you the stink eye.
Constant boredom.
When teachers assign projects and tests at the same time.
Not being invited to something that all your friends are going to.
Having nothing to wear.
Having a curfew when no one else does.
When your mom makes you to try on clothes in the dressing room so she can see how they fit.
When your dad makes corny jokes in front of your friends.
Trying to get a job without work experience.
Not being able to pass your written driver’s test.
A 4th period teacher who hates you for no reason.
When your crush doesn’t notice you.
A butt-ugly yearbook picture.
Getting picked last on a team in P.E.
Hating on prom because you don’t have a date.
Feeling like no one in the world understands you.
Parents who won’t leave you alone.
Feeling exhausted at school and wide awake at midnight.
Pretending you have your future all figured out when you don’t.
Wanting to get out of this town.
Wanting to be noticed and go unnoticed at the same time.
Knowing you’re meant for so much more.
When parents ask for your opinion and then tell you you’re wrong.
When school feels like it’s killing your spirit.
Parents hating on your music.
Having to take care of your sibling.
Parents who won’t let you leave the house “dressed like that.”
Having zero privacy.
Sharing a bathroom.
Not being able to go to a concert on a weeknight.
Always needing a ride.
Knowing your real life is waiting for you.
Finals.
Shattering your phone screen.
Trigonometry.
Parents hanging out at your birthday party.
Hating your driver’s license photo.
Having to love Disney movies in secret.
Not being able to get into R-rated movies.
Crushing on a celebrity so hard it physically hurts.
Your parents thinking it’s “cute” when you drink coffee.
PSATs.
SATs.
College applications.
College essays.
Maybe not wanting to go to college …
People who laugh at your dreams.
Slow Wi-Fi.
Too many people logged into Netflix at once.
People who think you’re too old to go trick-or-treating.
Parents who track your cell phone.
Caring too much about what other people think.
Being forced to do your own laundry.
Having to visit a pediatrician like a 3-year-old.
All things braces.
Liking someone who doesn’t like you back.
Getting tagged in awful Facebook photos.
Being clumsy.
The school dress code.
Rumors.
Not being 18.
Not being 21.