Is Your Partner Worth Sacrificing For? 4 Questions to Ask Yourself

When I married at the tender age of 22, I thought I was ever so mature for having this list of marriage non-negotiables:

He must want kids.

He must value family.

He must be kind.

That was it. What I didn’t know then was just how many other concessions I’d have to make to keep my married ship afloat. Sacrifices over money, career moves, religion, schedules, and the infinitely annoying (albeit personally important) things like DVR space, movie selections, and decorative bedding were just the beginning.

Over time I reluctantly learned that mutual sacrifice, or rather compromise served as the cornerstone of success in marriage. Sure, people always preached about compromise, but until you’re well-versed in the fine art of practicing mutual negotiation, compromise is nothing more than an idea that sounds good in theory.

While I’m all for sacrificing for the greater good, I’m wife enough to admit I keep mental score in my marriage. I may not remember much, but I’ll always remember who wiped the last poopy butt, because really, no one person should have do all the bending (or butt wiping) in a relationship.

We’ve all been called upon to make sacrifices in our relationships, but there are times we have to consider whether the sacrifice is worth the cost. Psychology Today suggests we ask ourselves these four critical questions when it comes to making personal sacrifices for the sake of our relationships.