Pregnancy Anonymous


Since I am obviously not a licensed psychiatrist, I am the last Mommy Friend who should be dishing out psychiatric diagnosis of any kind.  Self-diagnosis however, is a whole different ball game I have been practicing for years.  I have decided I suffer from Pregnancy Addiction, if there even is such a thing.  So I just capitalized the term which made it look medically official but I’m pretty sure it’s not.  So if you will go with me here, I think maybe I’ve got something.

Most Mommy Friends who have been pregnant have loved the attention.  I mean, I think you have, I did.  I can tell you that attention was all I had, especially in the later months when I outweighed my husband and child combined. 


Yes it’s true, I loved all the special treatment, the warm smiles from strangers, the special “Expectant Mothers” parking sign and how round my belly had become.  I was all powerful and all female; see Queen of the Universe for a more in-depth analysis.  So my pregnant psyche was unstoppable and yet my rolly polly body was quite the contrary.  I loved the maternal glow and have almost managed to forget the nausea that lasted until 20 weeks.  And then there was the baby shower, a reunion of wonderful old friends who showered me with well-wishes and adorable onsies.

Little BooBoo’s Baby Shower

The baby shower was just the highlight of my pregnancy until labor day, more please!  And finally, as a working Mommy Friend I sort of enjoyed the free pass my pregnancy gave me for 5 months of maternity leave; not too shabby.

It is with a little shame that I type the following admission so please, no judgment:  

When my precious baby finally arrived after 40 patient weeks of daydreaming, I was a little surprised to learn my public just wasn’t into me, they were into my baby. 

Ooo, what a harsh reality Mommy Friend, apparently I am that needy.  Suddenly I found myself in the corner all fresh from my postpartum tour of duty and all anyone could talk about was my gorgeous new baby.  And of course, that was the way it’s supposed to be, all of this pregnancy business was leading up my baby’s birthday!  As in love as I was with my new baby, suddenly being bumped from my throne of greatness was a lot to handle as I came down from my preggo hormone high.

There is no question, children are the best thing ever.  I love my children and if I my time and resources allowed, I’d have a gazillion more because I know there’s a girl in there somewhere.  I’ll just say I miss pregnancy and that ain’t baby fever talking.  I miss the feeling of greatness, invincibility and ability to embrace my growing waistline.  Pregnancy gave me a sense of something much greater than myself, the feeling of possibility was awe-inspiring and those are some beautiful feelings.

So it’s not anonymous but I’ll say it anyway: My name is Mommy Friend Lori and I heart pregnancy.  If you are a personal friend of mine, I’ve probably already lived vicariously through your pregnancy and I’m ready for you to have another, just FYI. 


  1. Your Mommy Friend Lori says:

    Gotta love our friends, always keepin’ it real!

  2. Pregnancy parking spots… ok so I might have parked there when I wasn’t but I didn’t realize til I was pregnant how hard I would have smacked myself for doing that to someone else! haha, anyway one day I did park there and a friend of mine recognized my car and left me a little note. When I picked it up it said “you aint no expectant mother you heffer, stop taking up the good spots!”I could not stop laughin, but my friend georgia was right that parking should be for expectant mothers/NEW mothers, cuz lugging the tiny bundle through the parking lot stinks just as much!BTW – totally took full advantage of being pregnant, loved every second and I ate at every craving I had. I am still trying to shed the LBS

  3. I LOVE the expecting parking spots! Those are the best!

  4. Oh so true. Funny how a little power goes to our heads. And then it happens again when your dependent little newborn morphs into a toddler and says no to you.

  5. oooh So NOT me! I HATED all the attention I got while being pregnant and a new mom. Total strangers coming up and asking me all these personal questions for no reason. Plueeze, leave me alone!I’m so glad that for the most part my baby is old enough that folks don’t bug us anymore…except for constantly asking why she isn’t in school. LOL! But she’s a big girl now and tells them she’s homeschooled. I can’t wait until she tells them we’re studying Sociology. LOL

  6. Haha! I am only on my second pregnancy which it is not going so great at the moment and STILL I am already daydreaming about my third! I need an intervention. We should form a PA (pregnant anonymous) club 🙂

  7. It’s true, I LOVED the attention I got when I was pregnant. People would look at me and smile. They were either ” ohh you look so pitifully big” smiles, or “ohh I remember that” smiles. Either way, smiles are always nice. I have to admit though, the best part was the attention from my hubby. The ” oh I know you’re tired, go put your feet up” attention! We are hoping to start trying again in December. We’ll see if that sticks around for baby number two!

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